Following an initial period of testing and turmoil, Kurt and Glenda began “performing” their roles and newly established routines with a high degree of mutual confidence in their performance:
Glenda: Yeah, Rishi [Trisha’s nickname] really loves her Daddy. It’s gotten where she doesn’t want me to give her a bath. She wants Kurt to give her a bath, because I’m less patient. It’s like I say “Ok, you got to get a bath and then it’s time for bed,” and Kurt, he just hangs out with her and they make bubbles in the water. (laughs]
Kurt: I like to play with her.
Glenda: And she likes that.
Kurt: Oh, yeah.
Glenda: But also, a lot of that is we kind of decided on routines, so I’m the one that gives her a bath at night, well usually, and so when I give her a bath, she just expects that.
Whereas some mothers might resent the preference of their daughter for father’s attention, Glenda views this preference with considerable fondness (and perhaps some relief). She delights in the affection expressed by Trisha and Kurt for one another and values the differences between herself and Kurt.
Kurt also frequently performs “single parent” responsibilities because Glenda’ job requires her to travel for as long as a week at a time. Kurt indicates that:
. . . it’s hard for me to be a single parent, going to work and taking Trisha to day care and doing meals and it’s hard to catch up on what you need to do until she’s in bed . . . I look at the up side of that, though, in that there’s time when it’s just me and Trisha, and she’s entirely dependent on me. Solely. And that has helped me bond with Trisha a lot, and helped our relationship.
