Home Couples & Family Psychology Child / Adolescent LOVE LINGERS HERE: INTIMATE ENDURING RELATIONSHIPS XVII. PLATE FOUR: CREATING A LEGACY (RAISING CHILDREN OR CONDUCTING PROJECTS)

LOVE LINGERS HERE: INTIMATE ENDURING RELATIONSHIPS XVII. PLATE FOUR: CREATING A LEGACY (RAISING CHILDREN OR CONDUCTING PROJECTS)

154 min read
0
0
27

However, Caroline did not actually come out and say this. Sam wishes that Caroline were “less compulsive.” He describes her as going at life at 100 miles per hour. He sees her as given to instant problem-solving, and worrying about problems long before they actually become problems. He doesn’t necessarily see her as impulsive, but just wishes that she would learn to relax more. He uses himself as an example of how that should be done and indicates that in the evenings, he has the ability to come home, enjoy a nice dinner and then sit in peace and quiet with a glass of wine and just “forget that the rest of the world exists.” He seems pleased with his ability to just wipe cares and concerns out of his mind with little or no effort.

Caroline is neither smiling or frowning at this point in the interview, but rather drily adds that it is hard to do that when the kids need attention: meals, baths, bedtime. All of this has to be done by Caroline, for Sam is often out of the house at business appointments (frequently at night) or at the Church for meetings. Sam is quick to add here that “he has responsibility for the kids in the morning since she has to leave so early for work (6:00 a.m.) and he doesn’t. She has the kids in the evening since his job often requires him to work into the evenings.” Caroline looks at the floor and does not comment.

Asking them to describe a typical day with their parents, family and friends did little to ease the tension accumulated at this point. Sam took the lead by describing Thanksgiving Day. Caroline refused to drive about forty miles to spend the day with Sam’s mother. There had been arguments between his mother and Caroline regarding Christmas presents for the kids. Caroline had “become tired” of dealing with Sam’s mother and refused to spend the day with her. She was perfectly content for Sam to take the kids and leave her to herself for the day. It was agreed that they would tell Sam’s mother that Caroline was will. Caroline added at this point that they knew this was classic cover-up and denial, but seemed not to be concerned in the least about how Sam’s mother would react to this fib.

Pages 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34
Load More Related Articles
Load More By William Bergquist
Load More In Child / Adolescent

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Check Also

The Intricate and Varied Dances of Friendship I: Turnings and Types

Miller, John and Scott Page (2007) Complex Adaptive Systems. Princeton NJ: Princeton Unive…